Here, Try This

I try not to complain much about the bad breath I so often encounter while out and about, but for some reason I've been plagued by it more than usual.

Lately whenever I get on a train, I end up sitting next to someone whose exhalations are truly noxious. Mouths with odors that foul ought to be declared a biohazard zone and immediately quarantined. Many times the stench is so repulsive I'm forced to relocate.

Back in 2004 a survey revealed that 90% of Hong Kongers have oral diseases, including bleeding and swollen gums, which indicates a pathological fear of the dentist. Evidently things haven't changed much.

Bad Breath

But the problem isn't confined to Hong Kongers; in Canada it was my misfortune to work with a woman whose breath was about as fetid. One of my other colleagues observed that her breath was so repellent it could kill a Beluga whale (and in Hong Kong, you're just as likely to run into ladies with horrid breath).

And yet never before has there been so much public education about oral health, from toothbrush and toothpaste advertisements to commercials for dental services. People are beginning to get the idea that proper dental care is important.

So why the big stink? And why does the guy with trench mouth time and again find the seat next to mine? It's moments like those that make wish I could shove a dental kit into his hands and say: Du-hude.

Maybe I could get a toothpaste company to sponsor me.

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