Frozen, Fragmented, Fertilizer

Regardless of where I might be when I die, I've made it known I wish to be cremated and have my ashes scattered in the Pacific Ocean off Hawaiʻi.

However if that turns out to be difficult, a technique highlighted at the Asia Funeral Expo might do the trick. Developed in Sweden, the idea is called Promession, and unlike standard burials or cremation, is less damaging to the environment.

First, the fresh corpse is placed in a "Promator" and frozen at minus 18 Celsius, then transferred into a biodegradable casket before being dipped in liquid nitrogen at minus 196 Celsius. Next the casket is vibrated, which shatters everything into an organic powder. Afterward the particles are packed into a biodegradable starch coffin for burial; within 6 to 12 months the soil completely absorbs the remains. No formaldehyde, no carbon emissions.

The only question is where you'd be buried, but in Hong Kong that's a problem. Given that I'm not keen to be interred under a village vegetable patch or a row of peach blossom trees, and given the likelihood that the State of Hawaiʻi won't allow my wife to dump a coffin filled with my pulverised bits into the waters off Waikiki (Shark Bait! Hoo Ha Ha!) or into Kilauea's crater (although that would be most rad), I have to stick with my original plan.

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