Or Maybe I Just Hate Loud People

I'm no luddite, but the longer I live in Hong Kong, the more I detest mobile phones.

Sure, they've made communication easier, but they've exterminated manners. Those of us old enough to remember the age prior to the cellular revolution bask in the memory of how enjoyable it was to have dinner in a restaurant free of electronic trilling and babbling idiots.

Before mobile phones, making or taking a call was considered a private matter. If you were dining with a surgeon or obstetrician, you knew there was a chance the doctor could be called away, and if an emergency arose the maître d' handled the situation with discretion. In other words, he didn't tear through the restaurant, flapping his arms and screaming at the top of his lungs.

Which is more or less the equivalent of what some Hong Kongers do when the phone rings, such as the social Neanderthal I saw heard in the Sha Tin New Town Plaza: he was standing in the rotunda adjacent to the train concourse and BELLOWING into his phone, his voice pinging off the high ceiling and bouncing through the far reaches of the mall.

Now imagine that in the confines of a bus or train. And the older the person is, the louder he tends to be. My mother-in-law is bad for this; when she gets on the phone, her volume rises exponentially, and God forbid she should get excited. When that happens, birds three miles away are startled from their perches.

I am aware that people all over the world misuse their phones, but considering Hong Kong's 140% market penetration rate, the level of abuse is significantly higher. The rationale for allowing mobile phones to be so intrusive is that an incoming call could be a chance to make money, and in this town money is king.

But the reality is that intense competition has given Hong Kongers access to monthly airtime packages with thousands of minutes, most of which is spent either gossiping or asking the most-overheard question ever: where are you right now? (at one time listening in on someone's conversation was considered eavesdropping; these days it can't be avoided).

People have become slaves to their phones and thus have discarded basic civility. It's gotten so bad that I've come to loathe any ringing phone; half the time I won't even pick up the land line when at home. And if I don't recognise your number on Caller ID, I won't answer. Period.

I may hate mobile phones for wreaking havoc in polite society, but they do have an upside: they make me appreciate e-mail.

E-mail is quiet.

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