Mr. Chicken-Poop Breath

Of all the types of bad breath I've had the misfortune to encounter during my time here, one stands out as being the worst.

And that, my friends, is breath that smells like chicken poop. I lived close enough to an egg farm when growing up to know that odor well.

I don't know what some people are eating that causes that nasty funk; most of the time you don't know their breath is repugnant until they start talking to you.

But how bad must it be when you stand behind someone on an escalator and are forced to walk down past him to escape the toxic miasma from his mouth?

My first thought upon escaping the noxious cloud was: Can you not ... smell that? It was all I could do not to throw him a package of gum and advise him to chew every last piece, but I had my suspicions that peppermint would be no match for that stink. My neighbour's dog has sweeter breath, even after he's gotten into the garbage.

To Mr. Chicken-Poop Breath and all others like him: either visit a dentist and get some advice, or stop breathing; you'll make life more pleasant for the rest of us.

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