Do Not Loudly

Notes » August 2003

I love the list of rules on the shuttle buses that run from our estate.

Most are straightforward, but a few could use revision:

• All passengers must go up or down shuttle bus at the appointed location.

— Would it be all right if I just climbed aboard and sat down?

• Please take care your things and carry when left.

— If I left my things behind, how could I carry them?

• Please do not carry any pat on the bus.

— What if he's drunk? Or did they mean tiny squares of butter?

• Please do not loudly on the bus.

— Loudly what? Talk? Sing? Belch? Break Wind? What? What??

Sorry ... I didn't mean to be so loudly.